Not meant for me

It took everything in me

Not to message you today

I've lost count of how many times

I've thrown the keys away

I did not barricade the letterbox

When I shut them out the house

So they snuck on to the mantlepiece

And made a point of standing out

I washed them down the sink

To get lost in an ocean

But they washed up on the sand and then

A seagull flew them over

So I sent them in a rocket

All the way to Mars

But they fell back down to earth onto

The bonnet of my car

Then when I buried them deep in the ground

To be sure they couldn't return

A tree thought they were water

And grew keys in bouquet bursts

Like blossom in the spring

Or conquers in the autumn

Every season that came around

Just brought more of them

And now I have

So many keys to get back to you

Every door and more has a way to you

Every cupboard, every drain, every window, every safe

Every drawer, every garage, every car, every place

My head works hard to stop my hands

From reaching for them at every chance

If I got hold of a single key

I'm compelled back to a place

That is not meant for me

Emily Jones, 2020